The Snaff Prize
The Snaff Prize
Join your krewe to compete in the Snaff Prize competition.
- Report to Varkk near Battleground Plaza.
- Defeat the Inquest.
- Speak to Zojja.
Click here to edit the reward data
- All professions
- One of the following: Chainmail Gauntlets, Ringmail Gauntlets, Scale Gauntlets
- One of the following: Rawhide Bracers, Marksman's Bracers, Studded Leather Bracers
- One of the following: Cloth Gloves, Linen Gloves, Velvet Gloves
Talk to Varkk. Watch the cinematic where Teyo claims your krewe's work as the Inquest's - and steals your prize. Fight the Inquest and their golems who turn aggressive. After another cinematic, talk to Zojja to finish the episode.
- Krewe Leader
- Councillor Flax
- Councillor Haia
- Councillor Ludo
- Councillor Zudo
Cinematic with Varkk:
- Varkk: Finally, you're here. We had to give up our space in the queue. Now the College of Synergetics is behind Dynamics, Statics, and Inquest.
- <Character name>: With respect, sir, that just means they've saved the best for last. Our Interspacial Translocator is this year's clear winner.
- Varkk: One hopes. Remember, the founder of the event and one of the judges is Zojja, a Synergetics alumnus. She'll hold us to a higher standard.
- Pol: Let's review once more, okay? I'll operate the translocator. I give the judges some banter, explain the translocator's brilliance, and then...?
- <Character name>: Then you fire it at me. I'm the most familiar with the device, and with being teleported, so I'm the least likely to regurgitate breakfast all over the judges' table.
- Pol: Exactly. You appear in a blinding flash of electrified brilliance, we prove teleportation is possible without a receiving gate, and the Snaff Prize is ours!
- Pol: It's brilliant. I can't wait to see the expressions on the judges' faces.
- Varkk: Right now, Krewemate Pol, they just look bored. They're waiting for us, so let's get out there and dazzle them! Snaff Prize, here we come!
Presenting the invention to the judges:
- Councillor Flax: Yes, yes, Teyo. Your Floating Grizwhirl is very impressive.
- Varkk: May I have your attention, please!
- Varkk: Behold: teleportation without a receiver! And note that my assistant is completely intact!
- Zojja: Solid work, Varkk. And this is the second time your "assistant" has impressed me.
- Teyo: You put on quite a show with other people's work. That teleporter is Inquest property. Fork it over.
- Varkk: What? Never. This is my krewe's, and we'll die before we give it up to the likes of you.
- Pol: We will? I mean...yeah! We will!
- Teyo: I was hoping you'd say that. Inquest! You heard those plagiarists! Kill them all!
After the battle:
- Councillor Flax: Stop this! The contest is over. I hereby declare Varkk and his krewe win this year's Snaff Prize!
- Teyo: Unacceptable! That device derived from Inquest research, and I have evidence to prove it.
- Councillor Flax: That's a serious allegation. The judges will certainly look into it, but in the meantime...
- Councillor Flax: The decision stands. However, in light of Teyo's evidence, the Inquest may now reclaim its property.
- Councillor Flax: After the Council fully investigates, credit and blame will be assigned to the deserving parties.
Speaking with Councillor Flaxx:
- Councillor Flax: You'd better hurry up and establish unassailable claim to the translocator. As an announcer, "Congratulations to the Snaff Prize Winners (sort of)" falls woefully short.
- It's ours. And we're going to prove it.
Cinematic with Zojja:
- Varkk: This is an outrage! How could the Council credit an Inquest lout over a genius like me? We can't even claim the title "Snaff Savant" in circumstances like these.
- Varkk: I will not go down in history as the only Snaff Prize winner with an asterisk by their name. This calls for an incredibly stern letter of protest.
- Zojja: Save your ink, Varkk. It's obvious Flax and Teyo are working together. And I will not let them besmirch Snaff's memory.
- <Character name>: Zojja's right. The Council accepted that protest and gave away our translocator suspiciously fast. I think that whole charade was rehearsed.
- Zojja: Which means it's only a matter of time before they rescind their decision, take away your victory and award the Snaff Prize to the Inquest.
- Zojja: I say we even the score. Let's take back your teleporter by force before they take away your right to do it legally.
- <Character name>: Translocator. Sounds like a plan to me. I put a tracking device in to avoid a repeat of the sewer incident. That will tell us where to find it.
- Pol: Count me in. It'll be tough, but I have a skate in this, too. And maybe if I help recover the translocator, you'll stop bringing up the Sewer Incident.
- Zojja: Let's get started, then. You pinpoint their location with the tracking device, and we'll intercept them before they can lock it up in one of their labs.
- Zojja: I've a few preparations to make and a few allies to switch on. I'll meet you on the road.
Speaking with your allies:
- Zojja: If the Inquest want to play rough, we'll play rough. Possession might be nine-tenths of the law, but the other tenth is my fist!
What's the Inquest's problem, anyway? Why are they such jerks?
- They're completely amoral, bent on world domination, and they only care about results...which they often get. That gives them sway with the Arcane Council, which gives them free run of Rata Sum.
But they're dangerous. And criminal. Why does the council allow them in the city at all?
- The council is all about long-term asuran supremacy. As long as the Inquest delivers spectacular and effective new inventions, the council turns a blind eye to their worst offences.
- All right, then. We'll just have to recover the translocator ourselves.
- And in this case, one is greater than nine. Thanks, Zojja. I'll meet you on the road.
- Pol: I'm ready to go. This is for Varkk and the honor of our krewe! Excelsior!
Are you sure? Nobody wants another Sewer Incident.
- Okay, look-that intern said he wanted to travel. It's not my fault half of him wound up in the sewer. Besides, we put him back together.
It was more than half, Pol. And the mouth kept yelling at us while we searched.
- Yeah, that was...troubling. But you found the rest of him before it got flushed away. Once we reassembled him, there wasn't even a scar. Oh, and let me say again: sorry I busted that overflow pipe.
- So am I. We both stunk like skritt scat for a week. Now, let's go get our translocator.
- That's the spirit. We'll make the Inquest regret trifling with us.
- Varkk: We can't let the Inquest get away with this, but we also can't afford to antagonize them directly. I want my translocator back, but the risk/reward ratio is problematic. I confess-I'm flummoxed.
Maybe I could help if I knew more about the Inquest.
- They're one of the preeminent intellectual and political powerhouses in Rata Sum. Things like morality and ethics don't stop them from getting results.
Why does the Arcane Council allow such villains to act with impunity?
- Two words: clout and competition. Stolen or not, Inquest inventions are always profitable and always effective. The council respects that. Also, having them around keeps the rest of us on our toes.
- They'd better be on their toes. Zojja and I are coming for them.
- Leave it to me, chief. I'll recover the translocator.
Speaking with other contestants:
- Pokka: Portable, receiver-lees teleportation, eh? Impressive, but you've got no chance. Our VOED is a cinch to win the Snaff Prize.
- . Dream on. The only opinions that matter are the judges
- Kozzak: My krewe chief is hungry for a victory, but frankly, I'm just happy to be here. Look at all this amazing stuff!
- It is amazing, but you haven't seen anything yet.
- Hronk: Not a bad teleporter for a beginner. It can't compare to our MIG...that's Massively Impressive Golem to you. The judges' decision is clear.
- True, but not how you meant it. The Snaff Prize will be ours.
- Kazz: Did you see our MIG? Some advanced tech. And if we could make my beloved Doxa visible while piloting it, the judges would be charmed into naming us winners.
- Maybe they'll add a swimsuit phase next year.
- Doxa: Greetings, fellow contestant. I'm piloting the Dynamics' MIG. The control interface a winner, but I'm still worried our demonstration is too subtle.
- Then you'll have to work to grab the judges' attention. Good luck.
- Previous text
- After helping Zojja fend off a wave of killer Inquest golems, I decided to show the residents of Metrica Province how a real genius gets things done. That should settle the argument over who is the premier inventor, adventurer, and intellectual paragon of our time.