Lord Faren/dialogue

Dialogue for Lord Faren for past Living World releases can be found here.

Dialogue

During The Secret of Southsun

I'm seriously considering a formal complaint about the Consortium's handling of this unfortunate situation.

Have you been caught up in the violence?

No, but I'm ready to take up arms if any disputes or crazed crabs need sorting out. Er, provided someone has an extra set of armor for me. Something a bit more substantial that[sic] what I have on.

Then what did you mean by "unfortunate situation"?

My situation, of course. I departed the mainland in a bit of a hurry and realized to my chagrin that I'd left my vast fortune in my trousers. Luckily, my old friend Kas is here to take me in.

Why did you leave the mainland in such a hurry?

Oh, just some tedious feline contest in ol' DR. I was hosting and adding a touch of class, but the partisan crowd turned ugly when their local hero wasn't fancy enough to win the top honor.

People do love their cats, don't they?

I'd imagine she's only too happy to help you.

It's easy to see how you earned your formidable reputation.

I'm sure you're not the only one.

Ambient dialogue

Lord Faren: Is that you, Kas? My dear, dear friend, I haven't seen you in ages. What a coincidence, us both being here!

Lady Kasmeer Meade: You were on the same ship I was, Faren. I saw you trying to hide.

Lord Faren: Not from you, dear lady. Perish the thought. No, I was merely...assuming a low profile.

Lord Faren: My exploits drew some unduly harsh reaction back in ol' DR. I felt it was time for a sabbatical.

Lord Faren: So I am traveling incognito to enjoy a temporary separation from my established social circle.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: What a marvelous idea. I was attempting that very thing.

Lord Faren: I never "fled to Southsun Cove." I...came to secure my reservations for the upcoming festival.

Lord Faren: But what about you? What brings you to this fair island?

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Business and pleasure. I'm fact-finding for Jory, and I heard this was a one-of-a-kind resort.

Lord Faren: It is that. One with a reputation for dangerous fun...well, danger, anyway.

Lord Faren: Truth be told, I was rather counting on that to discourage any other visitors from DR.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you're here. If I did, I wouldn't have you all to myself.

Lord Faren: So you and Jory don't do bodyguard work. Too bad. My body could definitely use some guarding.

Lord Faren: I was trained in single combat, of course, but I'm currently facing a much less fortuitous ratio.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Right, you were Swordmaster Bongo's prize student. Your parents paid extra for the title.

Lord Faren: Well I don't like to brag...wait, what?

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Sorry, I meant "training." They paid extra for the special training that made you so formidable.

Lord Faren: I'd be an excellent pirate. "Captain Faren, Scourge of the High Seas." And of the high-end taverns.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: I can definitely see you with a cutlass and a corsair's hat, swashbuckling the day away.

Lord Faren: I like the sound of that! That is to say, "Har! Yar! Avast!" and so forth.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: I suggest calling yourself Faren the Tongueless and remaining silent until you've mastered the lingo.

Lord Faren: I've built us a house with my own two hands. You're not the only noble who works, you know.

Lord Faren: Now we can stay here together forever, rent-free!

Lady Kasmeer Meade: That's sweet, but are you sure it's finished?

Lady Kasmeer Meade: It looks more like a foundation. For a hovel that's designed to lower property values.

Lord Faren: I'm a trend-setter, my dear. Soon all our friends will have beach homes like this one.

Lord Faren: Why not? You're here, I'm here, the waves are crashing romantically upon the shore.

Lord Faren: It's not like we've never kissed before.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: We were eight.

Lord Faren: And I've carried a torch for you ever since. Surely proof that my love is no mere schoolboy's trifle.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Yes, well...not to change the subject, but I think you need to wax again. Your stubble is showing.

Lord Faren: Have you heard the scuttlebutt? The Captain's Council is simple riven over the upcoming festival.

Lord Faren: Half want to honor tradition and make the traditional profit.

Lord Faren: The rest think it's bad form to have a dragon festival in the middle of a dragon war.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: I understand it's a delicate subject, but isn't the council always at each other's throats?

Lord Faren: Only when they're not trying to stick knives in each other's backs.

During Last Stand at Southsun

As soon I[sic] return to Divinity's Reach, the Consortium will be hearing from my solicitor about all the nonsense I've been forced to endure.

You mean the crazed animals and the settler rioting?

'Dear me, no. I avoided meddling in any local nonsense. Besides, the Lionguard handled that dual imbroglio adequately enough without my assistance.

What's your complaint with the Consortium, then?

A distinct lack of consideration commensurate with my station. I expected some tact and grace in the handling of a temporary lack of access to my considerable wealth, but I expected in vain.

Why were you without funds?

In my hasty departure, I neglected to bring currency. Not even a scrap of paper to write IOUs on. If not for my friend Kas, the Consortium would have let me starve like some common stray cat.

Cat–Wait, were you involved in that cat show riot in Divinity's Reach?

Er, I'm sure you must be confusing me with another master of ceremonies that was driven from DR by an angry mob. One far less dashing than myself.

I see. An honest mistake, then.

I see that you were the real victim here.

Vain does seem to be the operative term here.

Yes, somehow they managed.

I believe you. Good-bye.

Ambient dialogue

Lord Faren: Such a lovely scene–you, me...and the stampeding karka, screeching and spitting their caustic goo.

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Indeed. We should probably take shelter. I'm heading back to Lion's Arch soon, and I need to pack.

Lord Faren: I don't suppose there's room in your luggage for a lord on the lam?

Lord Faren: If you hang me up after you unpack me, I swear I won't wrinkle.

During Festival of the Four Winds

Marvelous, isn't it? The Crown Pavilion running at full tilt, people enjoying themselves, Lion's Arch benefiting...and this time we won't have a crazed sylvari provocateur ruining everyone's fun.

I heard about that. Scarlet took control of the watchknights last time, didn't she?

Fear not, my friend! I sat on the royal comittee that overhauled the entire watchknight army. We made sure to magically and mechanically protect every last component against outside tampering.

So they're safe now? Totally under-control?

Absolutely. This event is to benefit Lion's Arch, but it's also to demonstrate that once again, humanity has endured. Scarlet took her shot, but now she's gone, and we're still standing.

Good-bye.

Good-bye.

Good-bye.