Professor Smoll
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Professor Smoll is an asuran inventor that can be found in Lions Arch during April Fools. They[1] are seeking help to test their latest invention.
Location[edit]
Items offered[edit]
- April Fool's Curios
- The items below require the festival April Fools' Day.
| Item | Type | Rarity | Cost |
|---|---|---|---|
| Fool's Tall Tonic | Utility item | Exotic | 100 Pile of Bloodstone Dust |
| Serious Potion | Utility item | Rare | 100 Pile of Bloodstone Dust |
| Fool's Dog Treat | Utility item | Masterwork | 100 Pile of Bloodstone Dust |
| Spiked Choya Psionic Tonic | Tonic, Gizmo | Exotic | 1 Fool's Dog Treat |
| Chatoyant Elixir | Utility item | Ascended | 5 Tiger's Eye Pebble + 1 Beryl Orb |
- April Fool's Mementos
- The items below require the festival April Fools' Day.
| Item | Type | Rarity | Cost |
|---|---|---|---|
| Chatoyant Lens | Accessory | Rare | 9 Chatoyant Elixir |
| Cloaked Cat Mantle Box | Container | Exotic | 10 |
| Invisible Cat Cape | Back item | Exotic | 10 |
| Chatoyant Infusion | Infusion | Exotic | 10 |
| Homestead Decoration Box: Café Console (Requires not having consumed this item before.) |
Consumable | Exotic | 100 Dragonite Ore |
| Recipe: Golden Sink | Recipe sheet | Basic | 8 |
Dialogue[edit]
- First interaction during April Fools' Day 2024
- Excelsior, brave volunteer! I trust you are here out of interest in my latest fantastical invention—certain to upend Tyria's height-based societal structure!
- I'm comfortable with my self-image but also eager to help. Tell me more.
- My new elixir, the Fool's Tall Tonic, will dramatically change your height! Well, your perception of your height. And that of others around you, I just need you to try it in various situations!
- Perfect—I get into various situations all the time!
- Excelsior! I'll handle all the paperwork and provide you with a few test tonics; if these run out, I can make more with a few reagents. Have a wonderful and scientific excursion!
- I can't wait to try this out during all of my adventures! (Awards Fear Not This Height)
- One of my resolutions this year is to stop volunteering for experimental trials. Sorry.
- Sorry, I was on my way to save the world and took a wrong turn.
- First interaction during April Fools' Day 2025
- Excelsior, brave volunteer! Once again, I am imploring you to aid in voluntary tests of my miraculous potions—and various other items of strange origin.
- Sounds great. How do I sign up?
- Just place your signature here, and a mysterious box will be sent to you immediately! If you need more goods, just visit me anytime. Supplies are unlimited for one week; don't miss out!
- (Don't look at the surrounding text; just sign the agreement.) (Awards (Annual) April Fools!)
- I swore off items of strange origin this year. Don't tempt me.
- Subsequent interactions
- Excelsior, brave volunteer! I trust you are here out of interest in my latest fantastical invention—certain to upend Tyria's height-based societal structure!
- Show me the achievements.
- I need more tonics and perhaps other miscellaneous exciting goods.
- I'm comfortable with my self-image but also eager to help. Tell me more.
- My new elixir, the Fool's Tall Tonic, will dramatically change your height! Well, your perception of your height. And that of others around you, I just need you to try it in various situations!
- Perfect—I get into various situations all the time!
- Excelsior! I'll handle all the paperwork and provide you with a few test tonics; if these run out, I can make more with a few reagents. Have a wonderful time and scientific excursion!
- I can't wait to try this out during all of my adventures!
- One of my resolutions this year is to stop volunteering for experimental trials. Sorry.
- So do these tonics make me taller, or just make everything look taller?
- Who can say for sure? Science is inherently an unknowable mystery.
- ...What?
- Do you know what the deal is with all these dogs and cats?
- Regrettably, I cannot ascertain who let the dogs and giant cats out.
- I have my suspicions, but I will keep them to myself.
- Sorry, I was on my way to save the world and took a wrong turn.
Quotes[edit]
- Greets
- Welcome.
- Excelsior.
- No refunds!
- Are you here to purchase something?
- There is no profit in the Eternal Alchemy.
Related achievements[edit]
Heights of Glory: Fear Not This Height — Talk with Professor Smoll in Lion's Arch to learn more about their latest creation. (0
) (Historical)
Cozy Café: (Annual) April Fools! — Speak with Professor Smoll in Lion's Arch to receive a starter kit for hijinks. (0
)
Trivia[edit]
- "Smol" (one L) is internet slang for a person or thing that is particularly small and cute.
- Professor Smoll was wearing the Skysage's armor set before it was fully released.
References[edit]
- ^ The related achievement refers to Professor Smoll as they/them.