Mystic Forge Contract
Mystic Forge Contract
This nondisclosure and confidentiality contract (the "contract") is signed and sealed on this date by and between the Mystic Forge and its owners, inhabitants, and executors ("Zommoros") and the very, very small group of individuals deemed worthy of a tour of said Mystic Forge ("you").
Zommoros has indicated that a tour shall take place that encompasses the property, its denizens, locales, and any and all events that derive from Zommoros's imagination and/or previous arrangements (hereafter, the "tour").
In connection with the tour, it is more than expected that you will witness confidential and competitively sensitive material not generally known to the public and/or other djinn who many benefit from said material. This includes but is not limited to: architectural anomalies that exist wholly through the clever use of Zommoros's magical aptitude, the nature of the Mystic Forge's workforce, the exact nature of the submission and trade processes that underpin the Mystic Forge, the creation of relics deemed legendary, the storage and retrieval methods of items within the Mystic Forge, the materials used to make platforms that can be elevated through the use of decorative water fountains, and the precise quantity of alcoholic material allocated to the Mystic Forge.
Zommoros has decided that while you may witness these things as a result of the tour, such actions are deemed permissible only by the signing of this contract and the forfeiture of personal responsibility on Zommoros's behalf should any incident (physical or psychological) befall you. Signing the Contract will relieve Zommoros, his affiliates, officers, employees, partners, agents, friends, relatives, and people impersonating him as a means of getting him into trouble from any such claim of responsibility, liability, damage, cause of action, bet, wager, gamble, or deathly hazard, known or unknown, which could happen, might happen, or will happen as a result of the tour (hereafter referred to as the "agreement," which is totally different from the contract).
In exchange for this release, Zommoros will provide you with a commemorative voucher of no material value that cannot be exchanged for any goods or services. By signing the agreement, you acknowledge this. This signature shall not in any way be interpreted as an admission of all the horrible, horrible things that could happen.
By signing this agreement and contract, you legally bind yourself to the terms of said agreement and contract on pain of death. You will become and remain, at your sole cost and expense and at Zommoros's request, a member in good standing of society (be that scholarly institution, military organization, guild, party, or other grouping of individuals in pursuit of a common societal goal) worthy of receiving the tour and appreciating all the wonderful things that you are about to see (hereafted referred to as "things").
Furthermore, you acknowledge in signing this agreement and contract that...
(The contract's text shrinks smaller and smaller, filling the space with countless legal terms, most of which you do not recognize in the slightest.)